Ask, Seek, Knock

Matthew 7:7-8  Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; Knock and the door will be open to you. 8 For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks the door will be open.

NEVER I repeat NEVER take this scripture out of context.  God is not offering free genie wishes here.  It seems like we are so apt to tell God what we want and expect it to be given.  With that mindset, you will only be discouraged, defeated and done with God. 

Ask; have you ever stopped to think that God already knows your needs.  He already has in His hand what he wants you to have? All you have to do is ask for it.  "Dear LORD, I want to receive what you have for me." 

Seek;  This isn't a game of hide and seek.  Life can be distracting with all the hurts and hardships we face. In the  midst of our trials we tend to quit looking for God because we think He has left us.  The truth is, He is right there with us.  We have just allowed our struggles to blind us.  Seek Him daily, you will find him.

Knock;  God is not home sleeping.  And He certainly isn't hidden behind a closed door.  What He is saying is this; pursue a personal relationship with me.  Come join me, I will let you in.

Strong and Courageous

Strong and Courageous

If I can be honest, even though I may appear tough and put together on the outside, I'm not on the inside.  I have fears that make me feel weak and afraid.  Even to the point at times of losing my focus on the path of God's plan for my life.  You could say fear and weakness can be major distractions.

So what do I fear?  Well probably not what you may think.  I fear failure, being inadequate for God's calling in my life, not being used by God, I fear missing out serving the LORD.  I also fear the voices; you know the voices inside your head.  No I am not crazy or insane.  I fear the same voices most people hear.  I am taking about the voice of doubt.    Some of the things I hear are “You are not adequate enough” “You are not committed enough” “You are not talented enough” “You are not wise enough” “You are too busy” “You will never be able” “You are not disciplined enough” “You are not …” And the one that seems to get us all “Did God really say…”

Just recently I returned from a Youth mission trip to Ridgecrest North Carolina.  Prior to and during the mission trip, satan was doing all he could to hinder, distract, and even stop what God had planned.  There were all kinds of issues, distractions, and problems leading up to the mission trip.  Throughout the weeks leading up to the mission trip, I began to feel doubt and fear.  But then I was also constantly reminded that I did not have to be afraid, I could be strong and courageous. 

Every time I felt doubt or fear, I always spoke Gods truth and promises to satan.  I also reminded myself and the all the others that God was about to do something big and satan was doing his best to hinder and stop what God had planned for each of us.  Through it all we all clung to the promises of God that we can be strong and courageous because He was with us.  Have you ever stopped to think and believe that if God has called you to a particular task, then He is going to provide the means and methods to complete what He desires?

 It is not the weakness of God that leads to our failures.  It is when we surrender to our fears that we fail.  This past week, we refused to surrender to the doubts and fears and through it all God moved in ways greater than what we had experienced before.  The testimonies of this mission trip are so great and too much to tell, but I can say this; we climbed out of the valley and rose to a mountain top all by the strength of God.  We may not be fearless, but we certainly learned to fear less. 

In the LORD, you are made strong and courageous.  Your assurance comes with His presence in your life as He walks with you and leads you.  In Christ Jesus, you are never alone. 

The picture is from top of a mountain overlooking the Smokey mountains.  We went to the mountain top to view the sunrise during our mission trip.

 

Deuteronomy 31:6 Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.

May my life be the proof and evidence of Christ’s Love!

To give up more of me is to take in more of Jesus:

As I was reading my bible this morning, I was going through Deuteronomy.  Deuteronomy is Moses’ address to the generation of Israelites that were about to enter into the Promise Land.  Basically it is a historical summary of the exodus from Egypt, the journey through the desert and the evolution of Israel’s relationship with the LORD.  Moses was restating the laws and religious practices that had been established. 

What caught my attention is the number of times you find sayings such as freewill offerings, set aside, and sacrifice.  It dawned on me how a quality relationship with the LORD is so contingent on willfully sacrificing.  During this Old Testament era sacrifice was centered on what was harvested.  You read a lot about livestock, various grains, oils, produce…. 

Although the New Testament era does not call for sacrifice of animals and grains, it does still call for sacrifice. We are called to sacrifice our things like our talents and income.  More than anything, we are first called to sacrifice self.  I’m not talking about taking your life, I am talking about sacrificing your selfish desires and sin directed life.  In Christ your life is no longer “me first”, but “Christ first.” 

I got to thinking, am I sacrificing me, my selfish drives and sinful desires.  Is my Christian life noted for sacrifice?  Am I giving up my way for His way?  Do I feel like I am doing without so that He can do within?  In order to make the most out of my relationship with Jesus Christ then I must willingly and freely sacrifice my old life in order to gain the new life He has promised.  This is not a one-time event; this is to be a daily sacrifice. 

What are you sacrificing for the LORD? Is it time, money, fleshly desires, profane speech, sexual immorality, selfish desires, personal gain, your comfort zone, addictions, fear, anger, bitterness, pride, personal pleasures?... I know I don’t sacrifice enough.  I hope that my sacrifice is always more tomorrow that it was today.  To give up more of me is to take in more of Jesus.

 

Luke 9:23 Then Jesus said to them all: “If anyone would come after me, he must DENY himself and take up his cross DAILY and follow me.”

May my life be the proof and evidence of Christ’s Love!

 

Jared is Going to Die

The same year that Beware got a new name, God had also put another young man on my heart.  This story is pretty cool.   This kid did not get a new name, but he did a new life.  By the way, this story is a little longer than most, but I promise it is well worth your time to read it.  God did something incredibly amazing!  You will be glad you read it, I promise.

At MFUGE, there are several track groups divided into various ministry focuses.  There are tracks for children's ministry, games and recreation, social, PCY (painting, construction, yard work), and creative.  I was in a group involving children's ministry.  We would go to various sites like youth centers, children's homes, and even community parks.  We spent three days at the youth center where Beware/Brandon was a member.  We spent another two days in East Saint Louis at a community park. 

Our mission at the community park was to promote an outreach for a local church.  We went around the community inviting neighbors to come to the park and enjoy a family fair that we were hosting.  There were games, face painting, skits, crafts, prayer groups, music, tournaments, all kinds of fun and entertainment.  All of this was with the intention to gather community residents together in order to promote their local church. 

I and two other teenagers went out door-to-door inviting people to join us at the park.  We were given a very specific area that would could go and solicit.  Anything outside that area was gang infested; we were not permitted by any circumstance to go into those areas.  Bright colored shirts were not allowed because of the relation to gang colors.  There were a couple problems.  First, I never got the message about NOT wearing bright colors.  I had on a bright red t-shirt.  Second, there was nobody home in the area we were in. 

The teenagers I was with felt very discouraged since we had not been able to invite one person.  So we prayed, we prayed for God to guide us to the houses and to lead us to open doors.  Guess what, God did.

While walking down a particular street we noticed a group of teenagers shooting bottle rockets at apartment across the street breaking windows.  At first, we wanted to turn around because we realized we had entered into "gang territory."  But God said go, I was not the only one who felt that way.  Both of the teenagers I was with felt very strongly the same thing.   Honestly, none of us felt threatened in the least bit.

When we approached the group, it was interesting, we were not threatened but there were some crude remarks made.  I noticed one of the boys appeared to be handicap.  I invited him and the rest of the group to the park to come hang out. My challenge to them was to simply come and just check out what we were doing and what it was all about.  If they did not like it, they could leave.  No promise on their behalf was made.  I expected that would be the last we saw of any of them.

We went home that day disappointed, the gang of boys never showed up.  A few kids did, but not enough to outnumber the MFUGE group of about 25 youth.  We may have had 10-12  neighborhood kids come that day.  That night I prayed, I asked God to bless the efforts of the teenagers and the passionate desire of their hearts to reach kids who live in a very difficult environment.  I asked God to allow them the opportunity to share the hope they had with the kids that felt like there was no hope.

Day two in East Saint Louis rocked our world.  A couple other mission groups joined us in the park.   Kids literally were coming from everywhere, countless numbers of kids and their parents.  It was amazing.  But still there was no sign of the "gang."

Around lunchtime I noticed the handicap boy coming with his parent's and a few other kids.  Some of the teenagers were from that gang we had talked to the day before. When I saw them coming, I knew something divine was about to happen I could just feel it. 

The handicap boy's name was jarred.  I met Jared’s dad as soon as they arrived at the park.  He and I began to talk about church and God.  He told me this, "Jared has been praying for a sign, a sign from God that he will be ok.  He has prayed for months that God would bring someone into his life that could help him."  He went on to say, "Jarred made all of us come today because he felt like God said we all needed to be here, so we came."  I said, "I am so glad you are all here, we just want to encourage you, pray for you, and show you who God is."

Jared's dad then shared something very heart breaking.  He told me that Jarred use to be a very healthy very athletic kid.  He talked about how Jarred had been the spiritual leader in their home and he always kept his family in church.  That is until he got sick.  Jarred had some kind of unidentifiable disease that was ravaging his body.  His arm was drawn up into his chest, he walked with a stiff leg, and his speech was so slurred you could hardly understand what he was saying.  The doctors had no idea what was happening.  What they did know is that Jarred was going to die.  His airway was swelling gradually to the point that it was going to suffocate him to death.  They had seen every specialist in Saint Louis and repeatedly Jared was given no hope to live.

I asked Jared’s dad if we could pray for Jared.  His dad smiled and said, "Please do, please pray for Jarred.  Prayer is so important to him.  His faith is so strong, but his health has pulled him away from church and our family is falling apart.  Please pray."

I gathered up a few of the kids that I felt were strong in their faith.  As a group we gathered around Jared and with his permission prayed.  It was the most spiritually intense prayer experience I had ever felt up until that time.  Tears were flowing out of every eye.  We left that day feeling so broken and yet so touched.   We all felt blessed to have been allowed to be a part of Jared's life that day.  It was so hard for us to go.  None of us wanted to leave Jarred behind.  

Two years later, we returned to Saint Louis for MFUGE.  I never forgot about Jared or Brandon.  I was hoping I might be able to return and find out what happened.  Unfortunately I did not get to go back to Brandon's youth center nor did I get to go back to Jared's neighborhood.

It was during our night church group meeting that I got the answer to what I was hoping for.  I was encouraging our kids to just listen to their hearts and do whatever God was leading them to do.  I then shared Jared’s story.  I shared how God led us to his house, and how we were able to gather around him and pray.  I told them that we will not always know what God will do after we are gone, but we just needed to trust him.  I then told them how powerful our prayer experience was.  This is awesome; one of our girls raised her hand and said, "I know what happened to Jared."  My mouth hit the floor and tears came out of my eyes.  Then she shared this; "We met Jared at a community park today.  Jarred was sharing how an MFUGE group a couple years before had gathered around him and prayed.  He explained how he was going to die.  Then he went on to say that a couple weeks after they prayed, God healed him.  There is nothing wrong with Jared; he is very normal and very athletic."  "Jared is very much alive!"

Sadly, I don’t have a picture of Jared.  Prayer was more important than pictures that day.  The picture I am sharing is the mission track group I was with that year.

 

John 9:3 "Neither this man nor his parents sinned," said Jesus, "but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life.

May my life be the proof and evidence of Christ’s love!

Beware Got a New Name!

Stepping down from the management position I had allowed me significantly more free time. The extra free time allowed me to become more active in serving with our church. Our oldest daughter Mackenzie was a teenager during this time and she loved the youth group and the things they did together. One of the more significant influences was the youth mission trip, MFUGE. MFUGE is a youth focused mission trip, through Lifeway ministries. MFUGE is best described as a youth church camp, mission trip and revival on steroids.

Carri and I have always been very active in our children's lives and their friend's lives. So MFUGE was a great opportunity for me to do something special with Kenzie in serving the Lord and building her faith with her friends. My first MFUGE mission trip that I helped chaperone was in Saint Louis Missouri.

This story is not about what happened with Kenzie, her friends and I. This story is about what I saw God do. He began to open my eyes to what happens when we truly submit to Him. When we surrender our all, He directs us in ways we could not imagine and He uses us in ways we can't believe.

My first opportunity through MFUGE was at a children and youth center. God brought to my attention a kid who called himself "Beware." Beware was a gang member, and he was about to be kicked out of the youth program. I was told by one of the adults at the center that Beware would not be coming back, that particular day was his last day. Beware had been enlisting other kids to join the local gang along with pushing drugs.

I asked the director if Beware could stay until the end of the week. At first, I was told "no." I went on to say, "God had put him on my heart, and I believed that God was going to use me to make a difference in his life. Could he please be given until the end of the week? If nothing changed, then by all means let him go." Shockingly, I was told "yes."

Boldly I began to build a relationship with Beware. I say boldly, I promise I was not comfortable at all. After a couple of days, I asked Beware if I could ask him some very serious questions. I also told him I wanted to share my life story with him as well. There was some divine intervention, Beware said "sure."

I asked Beware this question; "Are you satisfied with your life, or do you feel like something is missing?" Beware did not answer, but that was ok. No answer meant he was thinking about it. I went on to share my testimony with him. The same testimony that I have been sharing over the last few weeks. When I was finished, Beware had tears in his eyes. He mumbled, "I am not satisfied, my life is hopeless."

I shared the gospel with Beware and then asked him if he wanted to receive the gift of life through Jesus Christ. He said yes! It was right there in the middle of the youth center in front of all the other children and youth that we prayed together, Beware accepted Jesus Christ into his life as Lord and savior. When we were finished praying Beware said to me, "my name is Brandon, call me Brandon. I have a new life now"

Brandon returned the next day with a rap song that he wrote proclaiming his new faith and new life. He stood before the entire group and sang his new song. Everyone was cheering, even the programs director.

The following year we returned to Saint Louis and one of our youth met Brandon at the same youth center. Brandon was never told to leave. Instead, he became a leader in the same place he was nearly kicked out of a year before.

The picture is Brandon rapping his new song about his new name and his new life of HOPE in Jesus Christ!

Revelations 2:17 He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches. To him who overcomes, I will give some of the hidden manna. I will also give him a white stone with a new name written on it, known only to him who receives it.

May my life be the proof and evidence of Christ's love!

Absolute Truth in an Absolute God

OK, so I shared in my last two posts how I figured out who God was. But there is more than just figuring out what you think is true. When things are left to interpretation and personal preference, then there is always room for error.

Relative truth seems to be a common theme for today's society. Relative truth basically says each and every person is right even if they do not agree with one another. Honestly, I can't help but think that relative truth has to be an absolute lie. Everything can't be true. I know I am right because relative truth says that I am right, there is no wrong in relative truth. So If I believe there is no gravity, then does that mean I can just leap into the sky and fly? When it comes to God, relative truth is not good enough for me now and it was not good enough for me then.

Relative proof was not good enough for me because I was searching for the absolute truth. That is why I tried and experimented with all the things I did. It was clearly evident that I had been searching for truth in all the wrong relative things. How did I know? Well everything i had been trying only offered temporary satisfaction and relief. When the relief subsided, more pain and greater suffering followed. Nothing positive lasted in things I tried. Relief was only brief and temporary at best. The negative effects were absolutely evident, and confirmed by the condition of my heart.

Ask yourself; "Are the things you are doing working? Do they have a lasting positive impact on your life?" Is your life the way it is now working for you? Do you truly have HOPE when you face HOPELESS situations? Do you really have peace in peace-less situations? What is the best way to determine absolute truth? Face the extreme. Don't believe in gravity? Try jumping out of an airplane, you will figure out the absolute truth the moment you hit the ground. Want to know what absolute hope and absolute peace feel like, experience a truly hopeless peace-less event in your life.

I figured out who God was, and the absolute truth became clearly evident by a new life. God literally changed me from the inside out. All the pain, hurts, suffering, depression, addictions, guilt shame.....gone. This was not a emotional or spiritual high, this was a life changing life altering event in my life. God promised His Holy spirit to those who are in Him. Romans 8:16 "The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children." I am not who I was, I am now who He has made me. I have not jumped out of an airplane without a parachute, but I have faced some extreme trials and difficulties since the time I gave my life to Christ. What became true the day I accepted Him as my Lord and Savior, has remained true even up to this day, 20+ years later. There has been plenty of tests and opportunities for my faith to fail, but that simply just has not been so.

So forget about relative truth, how about trying the absolute? I have heard and experienced the absolute effects and presence of God in my life and in and through the lives and testimonies of people around the world. God will absolutely come into your life and absolutely bring you peace, hope, purpose and all the other fruits He promises when you accept His invitation to become your Lord and savior.

The picture is of my buddy Tom and I. We were dressed as "Super Heroes" at church camp. Both of us absolutely had no extra powers or the ability to fly in spite of the capes, hats, cool shades, and high voltage.

John 14:6 Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

May my life be the proof and evidence of Christ's love!

Unconditional Love and The Bet Was On.

My "There is a God" encounter with Carri resulted in  becoming best friends.  The awkward thing about our friendship; Carri  set me up on dates with her friends.  What I did not know at that time was Carri thought to herself  I was out of her league.  How crazy a thought was that?  Gorgeous blue-eyed captain of the flag corps blonde thinks a lowly, shy, under achieving brokenhearted wimp is out of her league.  Now that is humility, on her part.

I remeber  hoping that we would date someday, but if friendship was all I could have that was good enough for me.  After all, this girl was making something happen in my heart that I had never felt before.  I really liked it.  I am not talking about lustful thoughts or even infatuation.  It was genuine acceptance, concern and unconditional love.  My family made me feel that way, but you expect that.  I took that for granted.  This was just so different; this was a friend who did not have to be that way.

The opportunity I had been waiting for finally arrived.    All I wanted was the chance to have an actual date with just Carri and none of her friends. 

Carri was sitting in her dad's ford truck in front of my house after dropping me offone day.  I was leaning in the driver's window  just talking to her.  I was trying to find the confidence to ask the big question, "Will you go on a date with me?"  Then Carri out of total randomness says, "You know this truck has 24 inch rims."  I looked down and thought, "Yep she is right."  My response to her  was, "no they are not."  Immediately she responded, "Do you want to bet?" Challenge accepted.  I responded without hesitation, "Sure, if you are right I will buy you dinner and a movie, if I am right you can buy me dinner and a movie."  With the cutest smirk on her face she said, "Ok the bet is on."  Long story short Carri won, which I already knew she would.  I just wanted a date.  Carri then leaned out her window, kissed me on the lips and then immediately sped off. 

What I had found, but did not understand was unconditonal love.  This is the same kind of love found in Christ. The unconditional love found in Christ is even better because it is not skewed by inpure thoughts, jealousy, or even lustful desires. 

I Corinthians 13:1-3 

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

May my life be the proof and evidence of Christ's love. 

The Bullying Saga Continued and I Doubted God

So where did the hurts and brokenness from bullying lead me? They led me to a place where I doubted God and His love. At least the God I thought I knew, the God of religion.  The one who was contained within the walls of a well-dressed and richly clad structure.  After all, is where I thought He belonged?  Why would the God of the universe live anywhere else other than a mansion built by the hands of man for His glory? My deceptive and disillusioned thoughts led me to believe, "A living God and all His greatness would not want to associate himself with a loser like me. As the years went on I found myself falling deeper into depression. 

When I turned 12, my family and I moved to a new home in south Florida.  Quickly I found myself being bullied there as well.  It all began right after I started school.  First, I stood out as wimp, I had little to no athletic ability and I was scrawny.  That made me an easy target for those ahead of me on the puberty journey of raging testosterone and bulging muscles. 

One particular incident that really stands out in my memory as a defining incident was during my music class. Let me startwith this, I was extremely shy and beyond timid.  Any time I had to be a public spectacle even in the confines of a small group I was terrified.  My heart would race and pound out of my chest, i could not catch my breath, my mind would spin and make me dizzy, and then that stupid bladder problem.  Yep you guessed it, I would pee my pants.  One particular class I had to play a song on my recorder in front of all my peers.  For me it was standing before a crowd at Carnegie Hall in my underwear at best.  Unfortuantely, I was wearing a pair of light gray pants.  The performance went something like this:  palpitations in my chest, shortness of breath, dizziness in the head and then the flood. Yes I pee'd my pants right in front of the entire class before I ever hit the second note of Mary had a little lamb. The entire class burst out laughing.  From that day forward, I was targeted. 

The intentional shoves became knock downs and punches.  The petty name calling became daggers to my heart and soul.  I was embarassed and shamed nearly every day. 

Our school had an area of portable buildings for classrooms.  They were all lined up in a square of either 3x3 or 4x4, I can't remember for sure. Either way this created an area, perfect for games like hide-and-seek, chase and tag.  I would hide and they would seek and chase.  Instead of tagging they would chunk rocks. 

Again the messages I head and believed:  "Nobody likes you", "Nobody wants you", "Nobody cares", and "You will never amount to anything."  Why I never said anything to my parents I still don't know.

Before I close this post, I want to make a couple things clear:

For one, God, the creator of this entire universe and all life that it contains, He does not dwell in temples built by the hands of man. 

Acts 17:24

 "The God who made the world and everything in it is the Lord of heaven and earth and does not live in temples built by hands

Secondly, the true loving God, the one we can call Abba Father (Daddy), He does want to be your friend and walk with you. 

John 15:13

Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.  These two very important facts I did not get at this time of my life. 

Me sharing Christ with some children
 in Santa Fe, New Mexico

May my life be the proof and evidence of Christ's Love!

The Negative Impact of Bullying

Like I said in the previous post titled "Bullying and the message it sent" I was hearing and believing the messages "nobody likes you", "nobody wants you", "nobody cares", and" you will never amount to anything". Think about these messages and the impact they might have on a person's life. Especially a person who already has physical and confidence issues. Please understand, this was not a message I was receiving from my family. I had and still have a really good family.

Before I go on I would like for you to know I am a youth pastor, paramedic and a registered nurse. So I do have a little bit of education, probably just enough to make me dangerous.

God created each of us with some very basic innate needs and desires. In my studies, I believe that Maslow describes our needs best. Maslow Hierarchy consists of these needs in order:

*Physiological needs: things like air, water, food, things that sustain life.

*Safety needs: personal and physical safety.

*Love and Belonging: involving family and friends.

*Self Esteem: the need to be respected and have self-respect.

*Self Actualization: reaching your fullest potential.

If these needs are not met sufficiently enough, then it makes the subsequent needs more difficult to satisfy. For example: if you take away someone's ability to breath then they cannot feel safe, love and belonging won't matter, self esteem does not count and self actualization is impossible. That is just the short and sweet description. You must understand that the hierarchy of our needs truly is complex and intricate in nature. The basic point is that each need affects the others. Even to the point of making it impossible to achieve a need.

So imagine this if all needs are met sufficiently, then life is good. How does bullying affect this hierarchy of basic needs? Bullying attacks you emotionally and physically on a daily basis. The daily "Bully Message": "nobody likes you", "nobody wants you", "nobody cares", and" you will never amount to anything".

The negative life impact is this; you lose your drive to go on, you believe there is no meaning or purpose to life, and you lose your will to live. You become angry, hopeless, depressed and even suicidal. Maybe you will strive to find answers and maybe you will not. I have been there. I have been angry; I have felt hopeless, I have been depressed, I have been suicidal. Why? Bullying of course. Yes, I questioned the existence of a loving God because of it.

Bullying robs a person of their will to live. I can think of more teen suicides than I would like to remember over my 20+ years working as a paramedic. So many of these kids took their lives because of bullying. Bullying in the locker room, school halls, lunch room, city park, in their own homes, and even over social media. Young lives taken prematurely with pills, ropes, bullets, knives, alcohol.... The message I am certain everyone of these kids heard; Life isn't safe "nobody likes you", "nobody wants you", "nobody cares", and" you will never amount to anything". Sadly we live in a cruel world because of sin.

There is a place of safety and it is found in the LORD, His name is Jesus. If you are hurting because of bullying or any other reasons trust me when I say, there is HOPE. If you need to, message me and let me encourage and pray for you. My hearts desire is that my life will be the evidence of Christ's love and others will see and believe.

Proverbs 1:33 but whoever listens to me will live in safety and be at ease, without fear of harm."

May my life be the proof and evidence of Christ's love!