Are You or Are You Not Going to Serve Me

     After the mobile MFUGE mission trip, I spent several months debating with God.  He was calling me to youth ministry and I was trying to convince Him that I was not able.  I am certain I had more excuses that there were minutes in the day.  So, the debate went on and on.  At times, I would think ok yes I could do this if I can become more like so and so.  I was always looking at other pastors and trying to figure out how I could mimic their abilities and gifts.  I would always come to the same conclusion; I cannot be that person.  Then I would tell God "see I told you so."

     Sunday February 14, 2010 is the day it all came to a head.  I was sitting in the front pew of the church waiting for the services to start.  Everything seemed routine and normal; there was nothing out of the ordinary.  All of the sudden I began to hear in an audible voice "Are you, or are you not going to surrender to ministry?"  I know it was not an audible voice that others could hear, neither was it an audible voice I heard in my own ears.  The audible voice I heard was coming from within my soul.  I cannot explain it, but I just know it was audible and it came from my heart not my head.  I tried to tune it out, but I could not. 

     Worship music started and I began to sing.  The louder I sang the louder the voice inside my soul spoke.  I tried to ignore it, but I could not.  My heart began to pound in my chest and my voice began to quiver as I sang.  I could not sing any more.  The voice I was hearing spoke something different this time.  When I could no longer sing and all I could do is listen, the music began to fade and God said "The answer is either yes or no.  If yes, I will do great things through you.  If no, I will be finished with you and I will ask no more."  Immediately tears began to stream from my eyes and I said "yes!" 

     After saying "yes!" to God, I went over to our pastor Brother Steve and told him I was surrendering my life to ministry.  Brother Steve smiled, patted me on the back and said, "It's about time."  At the end of the service, I went forward and made my profession of commitment to ministry public before the church.  I never felt so excited about my faith before than like I had that day.  God was not looking for my qualifications; He wanted to qualify His calling on my life. 

     All my excuses were all about me and not about what God could do.  Ministry should never ever be about the pastor or leader; it should always be about God.   God created us in His image and we try to recreate God in ours.  How wrong we are in this thought.  God does not call the qualified, He qualifies the called.

This is me and ministering to an older man
 in Nicaragua with one of my interpreters, Jesus!

I Corinthians 1:25-31 For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength. 26 Brothers, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. 27 But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. 28 He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things--and the things that are not--to nullify the things that are, 29 so that no one may boast before him. 30 It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God--that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. 31 Therefore, as it is written: "Let him who boasts boast in the Lord."

May my life be the proof and evidence of His love!