She Was Not a god, but a Reflection of God.

My friendship with Carri grew and became something even bigger but not better.  Carri became my god.  Our relationship was not your typical fairy tale, or was it?  I guess you can decide as my story unfolds over the next several days.   As you read, remember the purpose of me sharing my testimony is not about Carri, it is about how I found hope in the midst of hopelessness.  As my life story unfolds, you will see how it all came together.  You will also see how God used Carri and life circumstances to lead me to Christ.  I hope it will encourage and inspire people around the world and that many will find the hope that I have found.  This hope will turn your life upside down, in a good way. 

Our relationship was typical for most teenagers, except for one interesting fact.  Carri and I always remained best of friends.  We never became bitter enemies.  Sure we had our fights, we had our breakups, we had our hopes and we had our dreams.   We dated off and on over the years. 

The biggest problem I had is that I made Carri my god.  No, I did not worship her religiously but I did allow her to become my reason to live.  I liked what was happening in my heart and being a part of who she was.  Like I had said before, she was different.  There was something so special; it was real and not a show. Carri was not fake.  Whoever she was on the inside is what I wanted the most.  Wanting that meant, I had to have her no matter the cost.

Frankly, the thought of losing Carri to another guy was devastating and heartbreaking.  I honestly did not think I could live without her.  Then, it happened.  She began dating another guy.  My world came crashing down.

Carri's mom, Sandy, was like a second mom to me.  I so clearly remember her advice.  She asked me if I loved her daughter.  I said "yes".  She said, "I don't like the guy she is dating right now, I like you."  She went on to say that who Carri was, dating was Carri's choice, even if she did not agree.  Then she said this "if you want to win my daughters heart, you will figure out who God is."    It was this statement that made me realize, there has to be something greater. His name is God, but who was He? Sandy helped me to realize that what I loved so much about her daughter was really who God was.  Carri was not a god; she was only a reflection of who He was.  At this point, the slow journey began to figure out who God really was.  This journey was not without hurts and failures, but its rewards would come in His time. 

 

Some Hawaiian god's...

but not the Real God

Jeremiah 29:13

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

 

May my life be the proof and evidence of Christ's Love!